Quitting Smoking- It’s Just Not That Easy.

I’ve been trying to quit smoking since March 1st, 2019. For the most part it has gone really well. But there are days like yesterday & the day before I just couldn’t get through a craving.

I’ve read a lot about this, and most articles state that a craving only last a few minutes. I don’t believe them. My cravings literally last 30-40 mins.

I do what they suggest , like drink a glass of water, do something to keep your hands busy etc.

I’ve been a little more stressed out this week than normal though, so maybe that’s it? Maybe the cravings are more intense with higher stress? Maybe the fact that I’ve had a pack of smokes hidden in top a high shelf doesn’t help either.

I was hoping after not smoking cigarettes for a while that maybe I would dislike the smell, taste, affect. Not really. Nope. I like smoking. I like the affect. The calming affect. That “oh muh gawd that was sooooo good!” affect.

I think I have caved and smoked a total of maybe 12/13 cigarettes in the past almost 60 days. Which is a lot better than 20+ cigarettes a day (that’s 1200 cigarettes).

I sometimes think fuck it. Just smoke, you are much happier and less stressed. But then I think about the fact that I use to smoke 20 or more of those nasty little things every damn day.

Maybe I need to figure out a better way to deal with stress. It’s been a crazy week. My face broke out something unreal cause the face cleanser I used changed their ingredients to a “New & Improved” bullshit. Ugh. Why change it or fix it if it isn’t broke?! I haven’t made it to yoga class in a week either.

Hell I’m lucky I went to work! But I did manage to find my original face cleanser and my face is clearing up again. So I’m in a bit of a better mood.

But still….. even the people I know that have quit smoking say that after 10 years of not smoking they get cravings. Like seriously?!??

I use to use heavy drugs for the longest time, and have been clean for almost 6 years, and every once in a while I think m about using but it’s not like this intense feeling. It’s more fleeting than anything.

I wonder if it’s the same for cigarettes. And why the fuck is it so hard to quit smoking cigarettes. Maybe I’m a little foggy on when i quit smoking crack cocaine, but I don’t remember it being this hard. It’s WAY harder to quit smoking cigarettes. Or at least that’s how I feel.

I guess I’ll just keep trying, I’ll get my ass to Yoga at some point this week, and maybe one day my cravings won’t control me and I will control them.

Have you tried to quit smoking? Were you successful? What was the hardest part for you? And what tips would you give someone who so desperately wants to quit but keeps having one or two here and there?

4 thoughts on “Quitting Smoking- It’s Just Not That Easy.

  1. I’m right there with ya Sis. I stopped January 28th of this year. I had smoked for 20 years. I tried quitting SO many times. But I had all the same feeling you do and I caved every time. Finally, I switched to vaping. There was a tiny learning curve but I got right into it and felt SO much better! I was getting my nic fix but in much cleaner delivery. It was perfect. About 5 years later I decided it was time to be done with vaping. I tapered down the nicotine levels slowly and finally was done on the date I mentioned above. It helped SO much to be able to taper off the nicotine rather than just cold turkey for me. I was vaping zero nic for months before I quit the habit though, which I discovered was my real addiction. The inhale/exhale of it all. I’m just taking it one step at a time and it totally does get better! You have to work at it but it does get easier, I promise! And I’m only 3 months in! So trying vaping would be my suggestion for ya, good luck!

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    • I have tried the vaping in the past, but it still had a huge effect on my lung performance. I’m trying not to put anything into my lungs whatsoever. Honestly I think I just need to find a better way to deal with stress, or stay on top of getting to my yoga classes for an outlet. The only time I really crave a cigarette is if I am angry, frustrated, stressed, upset etc. So if I can master a way of dealing with this specific emotions, I think I might be ok. Boredom seems to be a big one too.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Uhg, cigs were used to be my fav stress buster! I know what you mean. Hang in there and remember that you can do this.✊🏻 I love that yoga is a good distraction for you, a good one for me is cardio,lol. It’s our bodies trying to tell us something I bet!

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